Finally ended all my programs and activities and can
concentrate on study week to study, but before starts, let slack awhile and
blogging, hehe… Hmm… this was not my plans to busy until today to only have the
time to sit down and without bother any other things else, but still hopefully
there are nothing else.
Start from my Sunday and Monday, I was joint Church
programs to organized a motivation camp to the standard six students, I think I
had said enough about this. What annoyed me the most was Tuesday, met my, he look
after my laptop and offered to format for me. So we format it together and half
the way he had to visit his wife to bring his baby to hospital for a regular
check up. After done the format, is the starting of the big trouble!! My laptop
could not access to the wifi. I tried various solution but just no one is
worked! At the end only realized that I did not intall the wifi devices. This
is the first time that I know, computar need wifi devices in order to access to
internet. At first I feel angry, why my laptop cannot online, if I am rich, I can
buy a better laptop so can avoid this minor technical problem, if I have money,
I can directly send off to shop and repair. Everything got blame just because
of money. Then only I know, it was because my poor knowedge on these technology
information cause to feeling. Yes, my common sense was so bad. So my plan to go
back University at noon was failed, and dragged till night only can depart.
Wednesday I thought would be a nice day to start
over my revision since I had even tidy up my study table although I am not go
to study in room. Just mean I had collect all my reading material. In a sudden I
remembered of my passport, I should renew it since I was not yet that busy.
Somemore strawberry told me that the ISC have not send the application form to
Korea. So she also told me that Sentul Immigration office was not that much
people, hence, I decided to settle by Wednesday also. Without checking any map,
I directly heading to UTC Sentul. First by LRT then Starline. Wow, its my
second time riding starline, damn worry because the route is actually quite
strange. Anyway, everything went smooth and I able to renew my passport in 4
hours, it considers effesyen enough I think.Apparently I went to visit the
surrounding of Sentul.
Wednesday night and Thursday I had sacrifice for
exchange program presentation and preparation. This presentation really screwed
up a lot of time especially you need to wait for other to present, it wasted 5
hours to listen all the candidates to present. However this presentation can be
say quite important because it will determine the chance to go exchange and
also the chance to apply scholarship. My group was used only 3 hours to prepare
due the the time constraints, as usual appointed by group members to be leader.
When you heard the name of leader and you know it, leaader mean to give idea,
brainstorming, yet all the responsibilty need to uphold by a leader. Luckily I had
some idea yesterday night before I went to sleep. What to do, just proposed my
ideas and start finding material and resources. Anyway I feel so glad that I have
a good teammates. By 11am I just need to leave for a briefing about Cambridge english
test, and they just help me to done almost all the slides, my job is just to
prepare one slides and conduct a rehearsal. Okay, most of them just seem very
relax and steady, this made me feel even nervous, just because I does not trust
my group members much of their presentation skills.
By 230pm, we entered the stage of war, to compete
with other group of presentation as well to fight for extra scholarship. The
first and third presenters was done really well by their content of
presentation except for the candidates number two. My gourp was assigned to be
the fourth position to present. After witnessed the first and third
presentation, I feel a little bit worried on our slides of contents, can we
passed the presentation? Anyway, just stood up the stage and start bluffing. It
great!! Almost all of my teammates can present well after the first rehearsal
we did, and one of the presenter even can have a good interaction with the
audiences, at least I think we won’t fail. Done, we did not get any negative
comments or positive comments. Presentation continues with following group, and
I found that their presentation was damn good, their entertaining was made the
audience happy, laugh and even go crazy. From time to time, I just feel bad
because I could not lead my group to share a more interesting presentation.
Fine, as long as passed then is alright. Presentation seems to drag till 7pm
and ended around 8pm while waiting for the annocement of result.
Everyone seems so nervous when the annoucement is
made. Fortunately, a big amout of people had passed and secure their chance to
exchange. The highest score was goes to my group! That moment I was surprised
with the result. Compared to the level of entertainment, I think my group was
far back with many groups. I am thinking, ‘is it I was too humble or lack of
confident on myself?” Why I just could not give myself a little bit more
confident. I wondering so much, with this kind od self-abased attitude, how far
can I move?
Thursday night, after the presentation, went dinner
with few friends and as promised at morning, to watch movie tonight. Counted
back, I realized that it was 3 months and 4 days that I did not step in the
cinema, and it a midnight movie somemore. 3am slept and wake at 7am, how good
if I can live this kind of lifestyle everyday without easily feel sleepy at the
day times. So they want to watch X-Men, Marvel movies actually are not my
strong interests like other, but is okay, since so long I had not watch any
movie. This movie was impressed me with some thoughts especially the images and
characteristic of the Hero – X-Men! It was first time I watch a marvel movie
that lack of great fighting scenes what made up the movie is about talking from
the start until the end, the story plot is really great with the hard
understanding conversation. The most special thought generated was I found that
X-Men even did not perform his great skills in fighthing, but what his roles
are to persuade, convinces and encourage people to make some changes! This was
slightly different than other marvel heros.
After I woke this morning, I think of this and that
besides the movie reviews. I was thinking, sometimes, for sure: we miss, we
love and we stay for a reason; and what would those reason be? It means when we
miss someone, sure there will be a reason, maybe we saw something that it
created a memory between us, it is undeniable. Thus, what the reason you miss,
you love and you stay. Is it because of desperate for somethings, or pretending
to be good… I wondering again, to know, although maybe, the answer would hurt. Once
I experienced, how a girl just crossed your life half a years, but you had miss
her for a years until the day you truly let it go. Moreover if the memories was
constitued for years, it is quite imposible to forget even used up a year time,
it needs more and maybe forever, the memory just too precious to forget.
I hate my emotions, why its just can easily
rememeber and took a small action as a big significant memory? The moment when
shopped, I saw a restaurant, an escalator; one two three step, every small
occasions just seem big for me to remember, but what it meant to this, maybe it
just nothing. Let past be past, and live now.
