Happy Day

It's been such a happy day for me. The reason is easy, first I had submitted all my assignments and thesis for this semester, and it was the tougher semester that I had ever experienced till now. I always think that my second year would be the toughest ever, twenty one credit hours, which is seven major and minor courses. So, life always goes forward with unexpected challenges’ waiting. Second, can I state that it’s my first time date someone throughout my twenty three years of lifespan, what an embarrassed record.

Let continue with the first happiness, do you know how the assignment and thesis had tormented me on this semester? Ok, let briefly talk about it. First, I registered eighteen credit hours along with graduate exercise, thesis. At first I supposed to take fifteen, so that I can focus on my thesis research and writing, but in a sudden feel like want to keep more credit hours for next semester, so I can repair some poor grade subject and attempt to make a second upper honor. However at present seem like too difficult except I can remain to get a good pointer for this semester result,  but due to my supervisor prediction, my thesis is quite difficult to get a good grade because of the poor language. Ish!! Language problem again, can I register in Taiwan and write again?! This is not the main trouble with the eighteen credit hours, but I feel like I had wrongly registered killer paper. Is it the lecturer had raised their standard in lecturing, why I feel that everything is tougher to study? Argh!!!! Like an idiot la this semester. Hehe… but still received some positive compliment from lecturer la, just not enough hardworking. Anyhow, this hectic semester came to the last portion of it, examination! Take a good rest for a few days and fight till the end.

Dating, ok, I think this is the most important topic that everyone interested to know more. So, can I don’t talk about it? Actually, it's not a dating like what a couple will do, just a dating that… it's hard to explain. How about we named it as an in-depth sharing section? All right. What is love anyway? Yay, a good question ever no matter what decade you’re living. There is no correct answer and standard I think, never mind, let answer what love needs? Oh… let combine these two questions to answer together since I actually have answers, but don’t have question in word structure. Haha… Thus we need to first ask(OMG, rational again ==), where does love come from? Fine, let use the religious approach, LOVE came from God, it supported in the bible: ‘ God so Love the World, so He sent His son.’ For what He sent His Son? Obviously is love and rescue, but it requires sacrifice. Hence, LOVE needs SACRIFICE. It works the same direction, what does a Christian needs to answer if he love his God, yay, sacrifice to serve Him is it. Furthermore, why you exist in this world, besides that God wants you to appear, because your parents LOVE each other and they made LOVE, so you’re the product of LOVE. Nevertheless, this product needs sacrifice, to rear them grow up, how much time, money and patient they need to give. So, what is LOVE or what LOVE needs? Definitely, SACRIFICE. We shared a lot, and I know, is not easy for me to love you, I don’t know what promised could I give, what sacrifice I can bear to build a happy future, and can I say, can you give me a chance to try? No, I guess. There is no more time to enjoy short term pleasure but consider a long term happiness, to not wasting other precious time. 

Is a happy day, merely when the reality after today seems cruel, can I still smile as yesterday, enjoy like today, to fight for tomorrow?

confused leh...

I always blame that to attend SERU programs are a waste of time, their programs quality is really lousy, even if they give me those slides, I swear I can conduct a better  activities compared to my instructors. Is it I am over-confident or conceited, I am just not respectful. However, some programs have changed my mind to make those claims, especially for those programs which invite the trainee from out campus who are profession in their field. I really enjoy few programs such as Public speaking workshop, NLP programs and In-design Workshop, these programs really open my mind where it defeated my conceited. I am still a nobody to be more sincere in received people teaching of knowledge. Ironically today I faced a dilemma in making a decision, anyway this decision had been made one weeks before. I promised to help out a programs at my hometown although I knew I have this in-design workhop, I just looked down on it, is fine for me to leave after lunch for the workshop, I just doesn’t care of it. However when the moment to leave is near and nearer, and feel missing and wouldn’t feel like leave! Why? Is simple, again, the in-design workshop delivers a new skills and interesting up to date editing software teaching. If you want to take this kind of workshop after school, properly you need to pay for thousands and above, but what the fees I need to pay now, it just cost me ten ringgit for two days along with six meals. How worth was it that only a dummies or those who not interested will let go. Unfortunately, my arrogant had caused to this destiny, I thought it going to be a meaningless activity, so I promised to help. But it just very perplexed me where I think, I should go back my hometown to help since they are not enough manpower. When I think twice, is it really they are lacking of manpower or just because no one wants to stand in front of the crowd and speak? I can imagine the condition since I had leaved, but if I continue to stay, I will remain the old me. Thinking that I have leaving for months, do I change much? I still remember the initial promised that I made, I will quite often available if the church need me, I will return and help. Maybe it is the value that inherited within Chinese value, please do not forget your roots. It is so contradict and confusing when you choose to hold on your roots and look forwards to improved yourself, how these two good values can integrates together? Let be realistic a little bit, what will I get today if I stand on the stage to give some words? But if I choose to stay for the in-design workshop, at least I know, I can get the knowledge on using design tools and a certificate in knowing a simple design skill. It definitely an added point to me myself values. I still remembered one words from someone on scolding another one, you’re so useless, why in your worlds there are only about GIRL and LOVE?! Can you please be a little bit stands up, and be a MAN?! hmm… I always admit, I put love in a very important position, I just feel so useless to be a good person but just cannot win a girl hearts, what for people keep praising me that I am good? It so satirize. One of my juniors once said, I think you are too clever that why you cannot get a girlfriend. I’m thinking in what sense she meant of the clever is? After that my course mates starting to agree with that, maybe I was too clever in the sense of I can easily guess what ordinary people think of. It was like, one of my lectures is really a great jokes maker, he usually tells jokes and for sure the student in class will laugh like hells, LOL and ROFL!!!  But for me, I really seldom feel that funny, I always can predict what jokes he tried to make, conversely, when people does not think that is jokes, but I laugh!!! What the hell!!! I am really a freak rather than say I am clever. My close friends always say, I can only find a knowledgeable and clever girl, however I am still a look a-liked clever BOY only, I am just not mature enough. Recently I met a lot of new friends, and I found one girl who has a special thinking which I feel she is quite clever and can think critically. She knows how to concern on her family condition and lives her life which shows her maturity. Haha… She is a foreign!! Don’t think too much, it’s just a compliment. If love need to consider this much, that’s why there are still a lot of single out there. However this is also the contradiction, it’s impossible to simply choose a person to be engaged with. Hey, please first concern on your thesis can or not!! Left two and a half weeks to go, are you ready to extend your academics year Mr.Terung? I meant if you still floating like this.

Recently found a new songs from Yan Zi which is nice, come listen listen…… 

Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow...

Her questions really bother me a lot, “How did you still live until today?” I told her, this might be one of the interview questions for a philosophy student who wants to enter top rank university such as Harvard, Oxford…  The reasoning why she asked was, she see me as a clever guys that has lost all interest on anything, everything for me just seem too easy and meaningless. My first thought was, hahahaha… what a funny interpretation on me, okay, let me think how true is it? and when i got to know some secrets, i just asking myself, "why i just couldn't get a completely love forever?" 

THINKING deeply..........

These days were a blessed day that I can say? I met a lot of interesting people with different enthusiasm, their life full with clear goals for what they are practicing in life. One of the persons was Green man, he was saying, “being an eco-warrior doesn’t mean you must be living poor”! This actually means, an altruistic person or those who are having prosocial behavior, does not mean that we live in poor. It can be defined in few ways, one is their spirituality satisfaction, another is they’re still working a well-paid job but just they spend their leisure time to help people or environment rather than wasting it on luxury activities.

I have to admit how much LOVE has influenced my life, I see LOVE bigger than anything in life, to have it, I even give up on who I am, what I want, just to fulfill the norms of the society that what an ordinary man should pay for the price of a great love. However no matter the workshops, the feeding homeless activity, the words from Juniors and many others; have actually open up my mind again, but how much it can help is still a question marks on it.

The more you open up your worldviews by attaching with different background of people, you can actually still find the people those who shares the similar idea and beliefs with you, and they are great, undoubtedly.

It just like I met a speaker, she is quite elder, I gave her a name “Princess Kate”, because the first sight I saw her was really a little bit look alike with the real Prince Williams wife, and I saw the fake prince Williams as well, hahaha… 

Secondly I met another Malay girls from UiTM, why to strengthen on the race and University is just to show that, a good human being does not affect by their race and identity and religion. 

Thirdly I was so surprised, I have a group of such intelligent juniors, in term of a good listener and full with story of life, so come to the end, we found out our department students are really almost all ABNORMAL or turning ABNORMAL.

Anyway… walk step see step first la… (: